By Cliff Mackin
Tribune Navy Correspondent

In response to yesterday's request, I won't repeat anything that appeared in the former column. How about a quick trip through the Hawaiian Islands, since that's where we're going now? OK, then, just follow me.

Beautiful Hawaii, nestling about 2500 miles west of the U.S. Beautiful maidens walk the beaches in quest of men. I know--I saw one once. The climate is ideal if you are suffering from the DTs, 
as Willmirth will tell you.

All the populace stand by to greet the ships as they enter the port, the girls throwing leis (I spelled it right) at you. Honolulu is the only city in the world where the servicemen stand in line for something beside chow. Between you and me, the chow is better.

In Hawaii, it's not considered polite to approach a native girl and say "how much?" The correct way is to ask coyly "didn't I meet you in Altoona" or "isn't it lovely weather?" Then ask "how much?"

The people are very touchy about foreigners who make fun of their ancient customs. After all, if the girls want to run around wearing nothing but a big broad smile, that's their business. We should look but make no comments such as "whatna squak that one is," or "do you need any beer money?"